Poo Poo Magoo

Jase lured me out of “the cave” at 5pm to do the above puzzle.

I spent Sunday in the cave with the blinds shut, leaving for brief moments to pee and feed on junk food. Yes, junk food. Sometimes a girl has to live on the edge. Considering, I feel the same regardless of what I eat, I do indulge from time to time: Cookies with coffee, 1/2 a cheese pizza, chips and dip, champagne, and the book “how to build a girl.”

All junk and all delightful. The book is absolute trash, but in a good way.

Oh, and Jase handed me a grilled pork chop sometime around noon and said I needed protein. Literally, handed me a pork chop.

No plate, no fork and knife. Just a napkin, and said eat.

The healthiest thing I did was read in Gabby Bernstein’s “Super Attractor” and did 2 meditations where I learned the name of my guardian angel is Emily.

Yes, Emily. It means “hard working and industrious”. Fuck yeah, you have to be to watch over my ass.

Last Sunday, I made the grave mistake of leaving the cave, which resulted in me cleaning the house and trying to walk on a trail. In other words, trying to be “normal”.

Both resulted in further fatigue and pain. I then began the work week at an unimpressive deficit of energy.

Not wanting to make the same mistake, I remained a cave dweller until the sun began to sink. If I stay in there with the blinds closed, I feel better about missing the day. It tricks my brain into believing it’s perpetually night.

We still have no answers as to why I’m falling apart. The doctors are working on ruling everything out.

This morning I set up a science lab in the bathroom. I shit in a paper hat and put my excrement into viles with popsicle sticks. It was both humiliating and disgusting. Off to the lab with my poo poo magoo to check for parasites.

A Thousand Bits of Genius

If you go to the Loo daily, keep reading.

If you’re into the whole holiday gift buying thing and you have avid readers on this list, then I have solved all of your gift buying problems. You’re welcome……These are available on Amazon through Kindle or in Paperback.

“By the Loo and in the Waiting Room” is a collection of short stories that are guaranteed to hold your attention. They are witty and will keep you guessing as to how they will end. You feel transported, like you are part of the tale.

Put a copy in your Loo and in the Loo of your family and friends. We all need entertainment in the Loo. Everybody poops, might as well enjoy it.

“Healing the Broken Things” is therapy through poetry. If you’ve ever been at a loss for words because of the highs and lows of emotions or circumstances, these poems will fill in the missing puzzle pieces.

There is a divine knowing written among the pages. Not in a creepy religious way either. You won’t feel like you’re 5 years old in scratchy tights, with sweaty feet, not being able to see over the pew. This is more like a divine hug, divine freedom to feel what you are feeling, divine acceptance.

These come to you by the author of the blog Athousandbitsofpaper. Do yourself a favor and visit her blog for a daily divine dose of genius.