Life can feel like something we caught out of the corner of our eye, instead of the rich experience it is meant to be.
Fighting numbness in our daily routine is a battle worth fighting. Put on your armor and get to task.
Stand on the outside of your life. Take a look from a different angle.
What do you see dear one?
I laid in bed last night, my body screaming with pain, worrying about money, unable to sleep. I took the med the doc prescribed and hours later was crying my eyes out still unable to sleep. I woke Jase and took a second med……..still no sleep…..meditation……reading…..pacing about the house…….thinking about my upcoming brain MRI…….the kids coming for the holidays…….
Today, I saw adventure.
I stood outside our fully furnished rented cabin with Cricket and looked inside. We’ve been on a 3 year adventure that’s still being written.
I saw our books strewn about, our favorite spots on the couch, the orchid still in bloom from a sweet girl embarking on her first year in college, the succulents given to me by a dear friend. The furniture we don’t own and wont have to fuck with when we decide to move on. The view, oh my god, the view we wake up to every morning.
I heard the conversations and arguments that have made our relationship stronger, the dinners with my boys, the tender moments and laughter. The joy Cricket brings everyday.
We don’t own any of it, but holy shit, we are here, this is our life right now. I waste days worrying and feeling anxious about my health and finances. I worry for my children’s safety. I’m wasting what’s in front of me.
Worry is eating me from the inside out.
So I stood on the outside and took a look with in.