The art of communicating in relationships gets tossed around like objects in the junk drawer. In a perfect world good communication would be instinctive, but often times it’s not.
If left unchecked, communication can become non existent or it can turn into a primal scream.
I imagine most of us have experienced both. What gives? Is there a “right” way to communicate?
This is not our first rodeo. I was married for 20 years prior to meeting Jase. He was married twice in a span of 20 years. Poor bastard.
Man, I could tell you some shit from our 3 years together! My favorite might be the time I left him with our 80lb cargo bike and he had to pedal 15 miles home, uphill…….there were some strong emotions left unchecked that night….OOOO there’s the time he packed up all of his belongings and started driving back to PA (his homeland) only to have his car throw an electrical tantrum.
Communication in the early days was gravely malnourished.
Through countless disagreements, crying, yelling, and threats of leaving one another, we have found what works for us.
Once the two of us are home, we grab a glass of wine and a stool so we can share our thoughts and feelings from the day. We also share any conversations we’ve had, with family, friends, co-workers or passerby’s.
We leave no emotional stone unturned and nothing is watered down.
In the mornings we have coffee and discuss what we’re feeling about the day ahead.
The result is we feel closer to one another and there are fewer outburst or misunderstandings. Having 2 set times to talk things over brings a calmness to life.
If feels rather proactive. We clear the air and nothing has a chance to fester and get infected. We’ve also taken the time to sift through our previous arguments, healing the wounds inflicted by one another.
We now laugh at the drama we each brought to the table.
Would love to hear any wisdom you have unearthed in your communication skills. Feel free to comment!
As always, thanks for reading, and keep smiling 🙂